Funny 1st Grade Sayings

I know it's summer, and I am suppose to be taking a break from teaching.  However, I can't help thinking about work.  I have such amazing classes each year, and I can't wait to find out who is in my room next year.

This year I did something a little different, and I wrote down some of my favorite moments.  These moments didn't revolve around me, but they revolved around the crazy things my first grade students have said during class.  Let me just tell you it is never boring in my classroom especially this past year.  I am so glad that I recorded these down so I will always have them to remember these crazy but smart kiddos.

Scenario 1
Teacher: "Why are you at your backpack?"
Student: "I thought I came to school with diapers in my backpack." Serious as he could be
Teacher: Puzzled and I am sure giving him a crazy face "Why would you have diapers?  Do you need them?"
Student: "No, but my mom might with my baby brother."

What can you say? He genuinely was concerned.
I am just glad my backpack area doesn't look like this!

Source: http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/originals/d8/43/ba/d843ba149a18579a5f95fd38df9b0283.jpg

Scenario 2 - Small Group Reading - Reading a chapter book
Teacher: "Does anyone know why the police called the mother a cuckoo?"
Student: "No, but she must be from Bolivar.  My parents say that all the cuckoos live in Bolivar."

Scenario 3 - Writing "Monkey Notes" (Conduct Notes) before Going Home for the Day

Teacher: "Why have you been acting up today?"
Student: "You know what caused my misbehavior?  It's this scar under my eye.  It has caused me to act this way."

Needless to say, he still got his monkey note.

Source: http://hdwallpapersbase.com/cartoon-monkey-wallpapers/

Scenario 4 - Teaching off the Promethean Board (Smart Board)

Student: "Mrs. Elizabeth, why is that written so sloppy?" Pointing to the Promethean Board in which I had typed something.

Teacher: "What are you talking about?" Confused as can be, because everything was typed

Student: "This.  It's sloppy." Getting up and pointing to words that were italicized "You wouldn't let me turn my work in like that."

All I could do was laugh and try to explain

Scenario 5 - Bringing students back from the bathroom

Student: "Do I have a booger in my nose?" Holding his head back so I could check

Teacher: "Really, you just asked me that? Why don't you go back to the bathroom and see?"

Source: http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/65/a1/a1/65a1a1ea6093bbfb985af8b2ba9118bc.jpg

Scenario 6 - Small Group Reading

Teacher: "When would you need to use a dictionary?"

Student: "I won't ever need a dictionary.  I have Siri.  She will be my dictionary."

Scenario 7 - Science Time Talking about Living and Nonliving Things

Teacher: "Is a hamburger living or nonliving?"

Student: "It is living in my mouth when I eat it." All serious.

Source: http://www.gospelgifs.com/art_pages_03/hamburger-001.htm

Scenario 8 - Math Lesson about Perimeter

Teacher: "Why should we learn about perimeter?"

Student: "When I get older and I have kids that are in first grade, I will need to help and teach them about perimeter."

Scenario 9 - Whole Group Reading Lesson

Teacher: "What is a crack?"
Student: "It's dark brown and sometimes itches."

Wrong crack!

Source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/thedailyenglishshow/7175035520/

Scenario 10 - Small Group Reading Lesson about Worms
Student in another group: "Worms! I can do the worm."
Teacher: "Do it!" I was talking to another person in the room.
Student: "Really!" Jumps up to do the worm.
Teacher: "NO!!! I wasn't talking to you." 

Source: http://clipbug.blogspot.com/2010_06_01_archive.html

These are just a few of the crazy things that were said in my classroom this year.
I hope you enjoyed them as much as I have enjoyed looking back on them.

 I truly love teaching and there is never a day that is boring!

Elizabeth